• Make time to listen
• R-e-s-p-e-c-t, find out what it means to me
• Listen
• Be honest and accountable
• Try to understand the situation
• Empathize with their feelings or motives
• Compromise & make mutually satisfying solutions to conflicts
• Accept changes
• Help each other out

"Snap Out of It!"

Izzie, I think my friend is in a slump. She says she has no motivation for homework, she stays up really late watching junky TV shows, and she doesn't eat very much. I'm worried she may be depressed. What can I do to help her snap out of it?
-Annie

Although I am not licensed to practice psychology, it does sound as though your friend may be experiencing some symptoms of depression. Before I recommend advice, please tell your friend that she should contact the UNI Counseling Center and see a trained counselor.

Depression is not something you can just "snap out of." Doctors believe it is caused by an imbalance of brain chemicals, along with other factors (such as family history, trauma/stress or pessimistic personality). Additionally, women are almost twice as likely to become depresses as men, partly due to hormonal changes from menstruation or pregnancy.

It's normal to have some signs of depression sometimes. But five or more symptoms for two weeks or longer, or noticeable changes in usual functioning, are all factors that should be evaluated by a trained counselor. Symptoms of depression include sadness or anxiety, decreased energy, loss of interest in usual activities, disruptive sleep, feelings of hopelessness, irritability or excessive crying, or thoughts of suicide.

The best way to help your friend is to encourage her to talk to a trained counselor. She may not think she needs help, but persuade her to at least have a depression screening. The counselor will then be able to advise her on the best possible direction from her screening results. Check out the "Weekly Lynkups" column for more websites about depression.

~Dizzy Izzie~

"Help"

Izzie, I have a friend who is always super busy with classes, work, her sorority and other extra curricular activities. Although she is fully capable of juggling all these activities, I think she’s starting to get burned out. She’s stopped eating regularly, doesn’t sleep much, and complains of being exhausted. Because of her involvement in so many activities, I think she’s starting to fall behind in her schoolwork as well. What can I do to help her realize she’s overextending herself?
-Lillian

College students are notorious for overextending themselves, and it’s way too easy to develop a "superman/woman" complex – i.e. you think you can take on more stuff than you can actually handle. The most important thing you can do for your friend is to simply be her friend. She may need a lot of support right now and probably appreciates a listening ear. Additionally, she may be feeling overwhelmed, alone, stressed, frustrated, etc. and could need someone to just be there for her.

She may or may not realize she’s overextending herself. It might be a good idea to talk to her about why you think she is. Choose a private, quiet place to have the conversation. Perhaps present your case like this: "I’m so glad we were able to meet, (insert friend’s name), because I know how busy you are. However, I’m a little concerned about how busy you've been lately. You're so great at balancing many activities, but do you maybe feel you’ve taken on too much?" This scenario allows your friend to evaluate herself and whether she is overextended.

If she decides she is capable of handling many activities, continue to be a good friend and provide support. However, if she decides she has overextended herself, encourage her to prioritize her activities. What 2-3 activities does she want to spend most of her time and energy on? What can be let go? If she feels nothing can be let go, perhaps encourage her to visit a counselor (273-2676) to sort out her emotions. This is clearly a sensitive topic, so I suggest you approach her with sincerity, genuine concern, and support her decisions.

~Dizzy Izzie~

Weekly Lynkups

• "Campus Blues


• Lifeline


• Types of Depression


• Symptoms of Depression


• Depression Basics

Don't be Stoopid

Three ways to kill or seriously maim your social life:

RepYouTation

Drinking alcohol lowers your inhibitions, and you might do things you would never dream of doing sober. Whether it's mooning your neighbor or hooking up for a one night stand, you can ruin your reputation.

Body Integrity

Too much alcohol can majorly screw up your body. Going to class with a hangover sucks, but a broken hand from last night's bar fight sucks even more. You're less likely to use contraception when drunk, and the last thing you want is an STD.

The Bars Scene

Illegal activities involving alcohol carry pretty heavy fines or jail time. Open container, minor in possession, or DUIs are nothing for a caged bird to sing about. Know the laws.

The Pledge

• Let myself be mortified by drunken pictures of me showing up on Facebook
• Let myself get drunk enough to be humiliated by my friends the next day
• Drink so much that I can't remember what happened last night

• Have a fun time with my friends, with or without alcohol
• Respect my body, mind and spirit
• Follow the laws- no jail for me!