Allow children to experience the joy of anticipation.
 

About eight million American women have anorexia or bulimia, and about 80% of 10 year-old girls report that they have dieted.
 

In one study, four to seven year-olds viewed a commercial for Cocoa Pebbles cereal. Afterward, kids stated that they wanted the cereal because it had a chocolate taste, would make them smile, and because Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble recommended it. One-third of the children tested thought Fred and Barney were experts in nutrition.
 

Keep saying to yourself: "This is going to work. It feels like it may not be working, but I'm going to try it for a month. It's going to work."

If you are married or involved in a relationship, include your partner in your simplifying efforts-even if he or she seems reluctant. Identify a simplifying technique that your partner will be interested in, and encourage him or her to join you in trying it. In return for his or her cooperation, do your partner a favor. 

Children learn by watching and by experimentation. Make activities fun, and your rate of success will increase. Also, make sure your expectations match children's abilities to understand. With very young children, alter the suggestions to fit their capabilities. 

Think in terms of slow change, and reward those small changes. 

1. Talk to friends and family members about simplifying. This will allow you to establish a base of supporters to encourage you as you try new ways of doing things. Talking to others will also help you learn more about your personal values related to simplifying with children (i.e., What do you want to teach children? How do you want children to remember special occasions? What simplifying steps are you comfortable with?). 
2. Give children the opportunity to cherish and care for possessions. Remember something you cherished as a child. What was it? If it was a toy, did you have multiple versions of that toy, or just one? So often, the things we cherish most are the things we have in limited quantity. "One" is often enough to bring enjoyment and appreciation. You give children a gift by not giving them everything they want. 
3. Don't buy toys, clothes and gifts on demand. Help children look forward to birthdays, other holidays and rituals such as back-to-school shopping. 
4. Give to others. Identify special times each year for every family member to decide what they are no longer using, and to give them away. You may want to try timing this to occur in conjunction with holidays or birthdays. 
5. Be open to "gifts" from others. If someone offers to give you a sackful of hand-me-downs, let them know you and your family will gladly look through them, and that you'll share with others the clothes you don't want. When you sort through those clothes, keep only what will be worn often. 
6. Ask around when you need clothes for special occasions. When your daughter takes her first communion, or when your son needs a specific uniform for orchestra, talk to others. They may be able to help you find used clothing that suits the occasion. In addition, talking to others allows you to share ideas about how to simplify these occasions. 
7. Involve children in planning for special occasions. Ask them to help you think of creative ways to make occasions special-especially occasions that celebrate an event in their lives. Then spend time together decorating your home, making crafts, or baking special treats to celebrate. 
8. Save cleaning time by displaying only books on shelves in young children's rooms. As children grow older, allow them to arrange their rooms and give them some cleaning responsibilities. 
9. Apply the "put it away or lose it" rule. When you clean, be sure everyone knows that, if their stuff isn't put away, they will lose it. Food will be pitched, clothes and toys given away. No fooling. 
10. To reduce the running to organized skill-building events, teach children yourself or hire an instructor to come to you. If you have three children in swim lessons, each at a different time, find an instructor willing to teach your children all at once. This can be a time- and money-saver. 
11. Say no to "double-booking." Thousands of enticing and worthwhile activities are accessible. Multiply the choices by the number in your family, and it's overwhelming. Pick and choose carefully what to participate in. Better to miss a good share of appealing activities than to rush from one thing to another. 
12. Participate in fun, frugal activities with children . . .make music. . .read. . .have parties with your neighbors. . .spend time in nature. . .make crafts. Take advantage of parks, lakes and streams, museums and libraries. 
13. With your children, create a list of fun activities and chores for them to do to reduce the number of times you hear them say that they have "nothing to do." Agree on a place to post it so you can all refer to it for ideas. 
14. Make family and family mealtime a priority. If family mealtime isn't a priority in your household now, you can gradually work to make it one. Mealtime can be a time when family members share daily experiences and connect with each other. If schedules don't allow you to eat dinner together, make another mealtime a family time. If it only works one night a week for starters, that's the place to start! But watch out for TV. According to the Eat Dinner Together Survey, 66% of households watch televisions or videos during dinner. It is a lot easier to give family members attention, and get them engaged in conversations, without distractions like the television. 
15. Adhere to a rule to eat only at the table. This reduces cleaning time, curbs overeating, and makes mealtime a more important time of the day. When children want a snack, make bread, cheeses and fruits available, but limit other snack foods. 
16. Make meals with children, and teach them basic cooking skills. Food is fundamental to life. By educating children about cooking and food choices, you help them take charge of their personal health. In addition, by teaching them about food and agriculture, children see the connection between the environment's health and their health. 
17. Teach children other arts-skills that you, your relatives, or a neighbor possess. Sewing, basic carpentry, furniture refinishing, languages, drawing, tree planting. . .the list is endless. By teaching them how to do things on their own, you give them the gift of self-reliance. 
18. Invite grandparents to a story-telling party-featuring them! Ask them to share with your family what funny things happened when they were kids. You and your children will love the stories. 
19. Develop rituals. Rituals might occur once a year, once a day, or just every-once-in-awhile. They help build a sense of security, help strengthen bonds between family members or friends, and usually are very low-cost. Some tips for making rituals a part of your life: 1) Identify activities that you seem to enjoy doing often, or that children beg to do repeatedly, and think about how you can support or enhance these existing rituals. Rituals may be as simple as eating popcorn every Saturday night, or setting aside a weekly board game night. 2) Be sure that the activity is something all family members enjoy doing, or it excludes and alienates. 3) Expect rituals to change over the years. What works with 5-year-olds may not work with 15-year-olds. 
20. Build a variety of traditions into holiday celebrations. Gift-giving doesn't need to be the primary focus. You may even consider limiting gifts to one per child. 
21. Make birthdays special by giving of yourself. Allow children to select their favorite foods at mealtime, and center the attention around the birthday child. Mealtime conversation could focus on the day they were born, and other special memories. 
22. Practice what you preach when it comes to money. If you need to improve your financial management skills, go a step at a time. You can improve if you set your mind to it. Many of the pointers provided in this handout work for adults and children. 
23. Communicate with children about your values concerning money, how to save it and how to spend it wisely. For example, make sure your child knows that you are happy to pay for a $20 pair of jeans, but if they want a $60 pair, they'll have to pay the difference. Make sure you let them know that that's $40 extra dollars that they won't have to spend on something else now or in the future. 
24. Teach children that activities cost money. Ask them to give part of their allowance to the cost of a new basketball, annual club membership or other expenses. Instill pride in them for contributing. 
25. Say "yes" without caving in. Children need to learn that they can't always have what they want. When they ask for something-like a new toy-you can acknowledge that they sure like toys and then talk with them about how they might get the toy (such as save for it, make one at home, or ask for it for their birthday). Practice the skill of saying yes while at the same time setting limits. 
26. Learn to ask: "Which do you want?" Help children learn to make decisions between two or more items. They will learn a real life lesson that they can't have it all. 
27. Help children develop wish lists and prioritize their wants. With diligence, they can save for items they want. No doubt some of the "wants" will lose their appeal long before children have saved enough to buy them. (Remember the thrill of anticipating something? It can be more fun than actually getting something!) 
28. Make de-cluttering fun. For example, drop uncooked beans or macaroni into a prominently displayed jar whenever someone walks away from an unnecessary purchase. When it's full (make sure the jar is small enough that it fills fast), take turns guessing the count. Then let the winner choose a special activity for the family to do together that week. 
29. Compare commercials with the real thing. When children get toys that commercials made seem so incredible, compare the toys with the commercial messages. Did the toys fall short of the marketing promises? During your conversations about commercials and toys, remember to be supportive and encouraging-this is not the time for an "I told you so." 
30. Challenge children (4th grade and older) to join you in living 72 hours in a "commercial-free zone." You will have to create this zone for yourselves by buying nothing and avoiding commercialism as much as possible. After the experience, be sure to talk about how it felt and why, how you spent your time, and how you might make the experience different next time. 
31. Help children learn the difference between needs and wants. According to Marc Eisenson, author of The Banker's Secret, the average child sees 30,000-40,000 commercials a year-a good reason to make sure children know what is a "need" and what is a "want." Food, shelter and clothing are on the "needs" list. 
32. Give children a gift of freedom. Help them learn to translate the number of hours it will cost them in work and time to pay for a given product. For example, how many lawns will your daughter have to mow to pay for her new basketball or new athletic shoes? A game (similar to TV's The Price is Right) might help reinforce the idea, say Neale S. Godfrey and Carolina Edwards, authors of Money Doesn't Grow on Trees. You need pictures of products (from catalogs, magazines and newspapers), a pencil and paper for each child, and an adult moderator. The moderator holds up a photo of an item, and each child guesses the price in terms of how many weeks of allowance or work (baby-sitting, mowing, etc.) would be required to purchase the product. After all the guesses are in, the child with the closest guess wins. 
33. When giving allowances, give them in denominations that encourage saving and giving. For example, if the allowance is $1.50, give six quarters. Encourage setting aside some to spend, and the remainder to save and share. When you open a savings account for children, take them with you to familiarize them with banks or credit unions. DO allow children to withdraw from savings for a purchase, or you may discourage savings altogether. 
34. Help kids save with "soda" money. Every time that you eat out with children, offer to give them the money that a soft drink costs, if they opt for water instead. This encourages savings, and is a healthy beverage choice. 
35. Encourage saving through the magic of compound interest. Consider paying interest on money saved at home, so children can learn how fast money accumulates. Also consider matching what children save on their own, or paying for only half of the cost of toys. You can return the other half to children-with interest-when they graduate from college. 
36. Make both "shopping" and "spending" trips. Go on shopping trips with children where you compare prices and value and then, a week or two later, take spending trips to make the purchase. This will teach children to comparison shop, and will avoid impulse purchases. 
37. Alert children to the costs of buying on credit. Charge interest on the small loans you make to them so they learn quickly how costly it is. For example, a $499 television costs about $575 if paid for over 18 months at 18.8% interest. Teach them to earn interest on savings rather than pay interest on loans. 
38. Tell your older children they can have their own credit cards -as soon as they have their own paychecks. (Refer to #37.) 
39. Teach children through others. Look for opportunities to enhance children's relationships with others while gaining insight into history. One possibility is to invite an elderly friend or relative to your home for dinner to talk about advertising and related topics. Help your children think about questions to ask and ways to be actively involved in the dinner conversation. A few ideas for questions to ask your guest include: Tell us what advertising was like when you were young, and how it has changed over the years. When did you see or hear advertising messages as a child? What products were marketed then compared to now? How have attitudes and values toward saving and spending changed? Encourage children's involvement in the conversation, and then talk about your guest's visit at the next family meal. 
40. Check out and read books at the library on saving and spending such as The Peanut Butter and Jelly Game by Adam Eisenson (for grades K-3). 
41. Broaden your family's view of the world. Books are a great way to learn that not everyone lives like Americans. Material World: A Global Family Portrait, by Peter Menzel, is especially good. Browse through and discuss it with children. The book pictures and describes average families in countries around the world. Your local library may have the book; if they don't, ask if they can get it for you through Interlibrary Loan. 
42. Rethink the "bedroom for each child" philosophy. A lot of joy, laughter and bonding may come when children share rooms. 
43. Maintain an awareness that with every new product purchase comes responsibility. Most new purchases will require maintenance and care-taking. Keep those trade-offs in mind before you make purchasing decisions for you and your family. Teach children the same ethic. 
44. Determine the costs of working outside the home. Calculate your real hourly wage by considering the costs for such things as commuting, clothes, meals out, daycare, vacation, 'escape' entertainment and-of course-taxes. Then think about the benefits and drawbacks of work. If you haven't already, allow yourself to make a conscious decision about whether to work outside the home. 
45. As a community service, ask your local librarian to purchase materials on simplifying. The 30-minute video, "The Adventures of Two Piggy Banks Learning to Save," by Raindrop Entertainment (888-424-3300) is just one example. Watch it with children and encourage others to watch it, too. 
46. Access some of the other resources available. Seeds of Simplicity, a project developed through the Center for Religion, Ethics and Social Policy at Cornell University, offers resources about simplifying that are specifically for parents and their children. Curing the "Gimmes": Raising Kids to Value What They Have, an excellent document by Mary Kalifon, is one of the many resources available. For more information, contact Seeds of Simplicity, P.O. Box 9955, Glendale, CA 91226; 818-247-4332; e-mail: SeedsOfSim@aol.com; Internet: http://slnet.com/cip/seeds 
47. For information and books about saving and spending, contact the National Center for Financial Education at P.O. Box 34070, San Diego, CA 92163-4070; 619-232-8811; http://www.ncfe.org 
48. Learn about taming the TV, toys and children's self-esteem through Iowa State University Extension's publications Pm1650 ("Getting Along: Taming the TV"), Pm1529m ("Understanding Children: Toys") and Pm1529h ("Understanding Children: Self-esteem"). They are free-of-charge and can be ordered from the Extension Distribution Center, Printing and Publications Building, Iowa State University, Ames, IA 50011 or by calling 515-294-5247. 
49. Take action. Encourage teachers to use curriculum materials that help children learn about the pressures to consume; the effects of commercialism and consumption; and how to counter commercialism. An excellent curriculum for ages 13 and older, available for $15, is Living in a Material World: Lessons on Commercialism, Consumption, and Environment. Published by the Center for the Study of Commercialism, the guide is being distributed by the Center for Science in the Public Interest, 1875 Connecticut Ave. NW, Suite 300, Washington, DC 20009; 202-332-9110, ext. 345. (You may want to encourage your local library to own this guide as well, as it has lots of useful ideas for parents.) 
50. Another action you can take is to participate in TV-Free America's annual National TV-Turnoff Week. For more information, contact TV-Free America, 1611 Connecticut Avenue, NW, Suite 3A, Washington, DC 20009; 202-887-0436 or e-mail at tvfa@essential.org. They can be found on the Internet at http://www.essential.org/orgs/tvfa/